The 30+ Best Gollum and Smeagol Quotes & Lines from Lord of the Rings

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Gollum/Smeagol might have been a minor character in the Hobbit and Lord of the Rings films, but he still gave us arguably the most often-quoted line whenever we want to talk about something special to us – my precious!

Brilliantly brought to life by Andy Serkis, who manages to make two distinct personalities in one creature very believable, Gollum is humorous, sad and sinister all at the same time.

After being warped by the insidious power of the One Ring for thousands of years, his strange character is one of the most iconic to come out of Middle Earth.

After all,many events in Tolkien’s series would never have occurred if not for him, including the final destruction of the ring.

So, in honor of this iconic character, we’ve rounded up all the best quotes by Gollum and Smeagol, from the ones you probably never forgot to those that were left out of the films, but are still worthy of remembering.

Shall we get started, precious?

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Want more Lord of the Rings quotes? Check these out:

The Most Iconic Gollum Quotes

No points for guessing which lines will go here tricksy hobbbitses, because these are the most famous and well known Gollum and Smeagol quotes of all time!

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“Bilbo Baggins: My name is Bilbo Baggins!
Gollum: Baggines? What is Bagginses?… Precious.” The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

“It came to me, my own, my love… my… preciousssss.” The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

“Mustn’t ask us, not it’s business. Gollum, gollum.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“So bright… so beautiful… ah, Precious.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

Faramir: What did they steal?
Gollum: Myyy PRECIOUSSS.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

The Best Gollum and Smeagol Quotes

One of the most interesting aspects of the character is how he developed a sort of split personality in his many years alone with the ring. Smeagol is the side that is still sometimes good, sweet and funny, while Gollum is the side that almost speaks for the ring, much more violent and sinister. When Gollum speaks to himself, we get some of the best, often humorous and sometimes sad, lines.

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“Gollum: Is he lost?
Bilbo Baggins: Yes, yes, and I want to get unlost… as soon as possible!
Gollum: Oh! We knows! We knows safe paths for hobbitses! Safe paths in the dark… SHUT UP!
Bilbo Baggins: I didn’t say anything…
Gollum: Wasn’t talking to you!” The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Bilbo Baggins: Why don’t we have a game of riddles… Just, just you and me.
Gollum: [comes towards Bilbo; as Friendly Gollum] Just… Just us?
Bilbo Baggins: Yes… Yes! And if I win, you…[gestures] …You show me the way out, yes?
Gollum: [nods] Yes, Yes… [Gollum’s pupils narrow as he becomes Treacherous Gollum. He growls as he back into the shadows; sinister whisper]
Treacherous Gollum: And if it loses… what then?
Friendly Gollum: Well… if it loses, Precious. then we EATS it! [Gollum giggles sinisterly; then he turns to Bilbo] And if Baggins loses, then we eats it whole.” The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

“Friendly Gollum: [his pupils widen] Ooo, Ooo! We knows! We knows!
Treacherous Gollum: Shut up!” The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

“Gollum: We wants it, we needs it. Must have the precious. They stole it from us. Sneaky little hobbitses. Wicked, tricksy, false!
Smeagol: [shaking his head] No. Not master!
Gollum: [snarling malevolently] Yes, precious, false! They will cheat you, hurt you, LIE.
Smeagol: Master is my friend.
Gollum: You don’t have any friends; nobody likes you!
Smeagol: [closes his ears with his hands] I’m not listening… I’m not listening…
Gollum: You’re a liar and a thief.
Smeagol: No.
Gollum: [sinister whisper] Murderer.
Smeagol: [voice breaking; hurt by Gollum’s remark] Go away!
Gollum: “Go away?” [Gollum laughs mockingly as Smeagol begins to cry] 
Smeagol: [weeping] I hate you. I hate you.
Gollum: Where would you be without me, uh? Gollum, gollum… I saved us! It was me! We survived because of me!
Smeagol: [stops crying] Not anymore.
Gollum: What did you say?
Smeagol: Master looks after us now. We don’t need you anymore.
Gollum: [appalled] What?
Smeagol: Leave now, and never come back!
Gollum: No!
Smeagol: [louder and firmer] Leave now, and never come back! [Gollum snarls in frustration] LEAVE! NOW! AND NEVER COME BACK! [Gollum is silent; Smeagol waits then looks around; then begins galumphing around with joy] We told him to go away… and away he goes, Precious! Gone, gone, gone! SMEAGOL IS FREE!” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“Gollum: [Sméagol is sobbing] Sméagol… Why does he cry, Sméagol?
Smeagol: Cruel men hurts us. Master tricksed us.
Gollum: Of course he did. I told you he was tricksy. I told you he was false.
Smeagol: Master is our friend… our friend.
Gollum: Master betrayed us.
Smeagol: No, not it’s business. Leave us alone.
Gollum: Filthy little hobbites. They stole it from us.
Smeagol: No… No.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“Smeagol: Master. Master looks after us. Master wouldn’t hurt us.
Gollum: Master broke his promise.
Smeagol: Don’t ask Smeagol. Poor, poor Smeagol.
Gollum: Master betrayed us. Wicked. Tricksy, False. We ought to wring his filthy little neck. Kill him! Kill him! Kill them both! And then we take the precious… and we be the master!
Smeagol: But the fat Hobbit, he knows. Eyes always watching.
Gollum: Then we stabs them out. Put out his eyeses, make him crawl.
Smeagol: Yes. Yes. Yes.
Gollum: Kill them both.
Smeagol: Yes. No! No! It’s too risky. It’s too risky.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“Gollum: We could let her do it.
Smeagol: Yes. She could do it.
Gollum: Yes, precious, she could. And then we takes it once they’re dead.
Smeagol: Once they’re dead. Shh.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

Gollum: She’s always hungry. She always needs to feed. She must eat. All she gets is nasty Orcses.
Smeagol: And they doesn’t taste very nice, does they, Precious?
Gollum: No. Not very nice at all, my love.” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Smeagol: …and take it for ME.
Gollum: For us.
Smeagol: Yes, we… we meant for us.” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

The Funniest Gollum Lines

Occasionally Gollum says things that are actually quite funny, or sometimes it’s just the way he says them that are humorous, including when he’s actually insulting Sam and Frodo. These are our favorite funny Smeagol/Gollum quotes.

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Sam: What we need is a few good taters.
Gollum: What’s taters, precious? What’s taters, eh?
Sam: Po-tay-toes! Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew… Lovely big golden chips with a nice piece of fried fish.[Gollum makes a noise of disgust while sticking his tongue out] Even you couldn’t say no to that.
Gollum: Oh yes we could. Spoilin’ nice fish. Give it to us raw and w-r-r-riggling; you keep nasty chips. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“[to Sam] Stupid, fat hobbit.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“No… No birdses to eat. No crunchable birdses!” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“It was tricksy, precious. Very tricksy.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“[singing] The rock and pool, is nice and cool, so juicy sweet. Our only wish, [he whacks the fish on the rock] to catch a fish, [another whack] so juicy sweet.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“Sneaky little Hobbitses.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“Sam: What are you up to? Sneaking off, are we?
Gollum: Sneaking? Sneaking? Fat Hobbit is always so polite. Smeagol shows them secret ways that nobody else could find, and they say “sneak!” Sneak? Very nice friend. Oh, yes, my precious. Very nice, very nice.
Sam: All right, all right! You just startled me is all. What were you doing?
Gollum: Sneaking.” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

“Sam: It must be getting near tea-time, leastways in decent places where there is still tea-time.
Gollum: We’re not in decent places.” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Sam: I heard it from his own mouth! He means to murder us!
Gollum: Never! Smeagol wouldn’t hurt a fly!” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Saddest Gollum and Smeagol Quotes

His long years in isolation with the ring had a huge effect on Smeagol, and while he did do horrible things a lot of it was more due to the evil of the ring than his own fault. These are the saddest lines by Gollum and Smeagol, that often showed the reality of what the ring did to him.

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“[guessing riddles]
Gollum: Uh… Teeth? [excitedly] TEETH! [Gollum laughs; Bilbo smiles half-heartedly] Yes! my precious! [very serious] But we, we… we only have… NINE. [He bares his nine, crooked, yet sharp teeth; to show emphasis]” The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

“[searching for “his precious”; the one ring; wails in despair] Lost! My precious is LOOOOSSST!” The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

“We be nice to them, if they be nice to us.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“Frodo: [in front of Gollum] You were not so very different from a Hobbit once, were you? [Gollum looks sad and lost in thought] Smeagol.
Gollum: [looks up at Frodo; genuinely surprised] What did you call me?
Frodo: That was your name once… a long time ago. Wasn’t it?
Gollum: [overcome with emotion] My name… [suddenly remember and smiles in recognition]  Sme… Smeagol.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“Oh! Cruel Hobbit! It does not care if we be hungry. It does not care if we should die! Not like Master. Master cares. Master knows. Yes, Precious… Once it takes hold of us it never lets go.” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“We swears to serve the master of the Precious. We will swear on… on… the Precious!” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

“They cursed us. Murderer they called us. They cursed us, and drove us away. And we wept, Precious, we wept to be so alone. And we only wish to catch fish so juicy sweet. And we forgot the taste of bread… the sound of trees… the softness of the wind. We even forgot our own name. My Precious.” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

The Most Sinister and Treacherous Gollum Quotes

The character of Smeagol was corrupted by the ring, becoming the creature Gollum under the ring’s influence. These are all the lines that demonstrate the more sinister, treacherous and downright evil side of Gollum.

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“The precious will be ours… once the Hobbitses are dead!” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

“Sam: It’s gone! The Elven bread!
Frodo: What? That’s all we have left.
Sam: He took it! He must have!
Gollum: Smeagol? No, no, Not poor Smeagol. Smeagol hates nasty elf bread.
Sam: You’re a lying rat! What did you do with it?
Frodo: He doesn’t eat it. He can’t have taken it.
Gollum: Look. What’s this? Crumbs on his jacketses. He took it! He took it! I seen him!” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

“[singing] Naughty little fly. Why does he cry? Caught in a web. Soon you’ll be… eaten.” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

“Smeagol: Clever Hobbits, to climb so high! [jumps on them, pins Frodo to the ground and grips him by the throat] Mustn’t go that way! Mustn’t hurt the Precious!
Frodo: You swore! You swore on the Precious!
Smeagol: [mocking] Oo-hoo-hoo-hoo…
Frodo: SMEAGOL PROMISED!
Smeagol: Smeagol lied.” The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

BONUS: The Best Gollum and Smeagol Quotes from the Books

There weren’t too many of Gollum and Smeagol’s lines from the books left out of the films, but there were a few, as well as those that were changed slightly. Here are our favorite Gollum and Smeagol quotes from the books that didn’t make it into the film versions, or at least, not exactly the same as Tolkien wrote them.

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“It cannot be seen, cannot be felt,
Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt,
It lies behind stars and under hills,
And empty holes it fills,
It comes first and follows after,
Ends life, kills laughter.” The Hobbit

“Curse the Baggins! It’s gone! What has it got in its pocketses? Oh we guess, we guess, my precious. He’s found it, yes he must have.” The Hobbit

“’Yes, perhaps, yes’ said Gollum. ‘Sméagol always helps, if they asks – if they asks nicely.'” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

““Smeagol,’ said Gollum suddenly and clearly, opening his eyes wide and staring at Frodo with a strange light. ‘Smeagol will swear on the Precious.'” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

″‘Stew the rabbits!’ squealed Gollum in dismay. ‘Spoil beautiful meat Smeagol saved for you, poor hungry Smeagol!‘” The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

Did We Miss Any of Your Favorite Gollum/Smeagol Quotes?

Let us know in the comments below!

Want more Lord of the Rings quotes? Check these out:

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Kristy Brandt

Originally from Tasmania, Australia, Kristy was living in London when she unexpectedly met a Dutch bloke and ended up moving to the Netherlands to be with him. Now she can be found taking numerous photos of their four weird cats, eating lots of stroopwafels and blogging at Tassie Devil Abroad.

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